Projects

Hey friends! Long time no see, huh? Seven weeks isn’t that long, but when you’re running a blog it feels like ages. I promised myself three months ago that I would consistently write and post for Sincerely Shresta. However, as we can all tell, I haven’t done a stellar job of it. I have a good reason. Well, sort of. I didn’t think it was possible to be this busy out of college but life always finds a way to humble me. I have a handful of projects that I’m juggling at the moment. There are meetings every week, work to do, prep work to complete, and so on.

You know when you’re watching a content creator and they talk about how they’re excited about a secret project they’re working on? Well, this is not that. My projects benefit none of you. Ha! Cheeky, I know. Growing up, I was told to keep my secrets, losses, and victories close to my chest. There’s a belief that if the wrong people know about your inner desires, then they’ll get in your way via sabotage or negative energy. In my native language, Telugu, it’s called ‘dishti’. Simply put, dishti could be equated to the concept of the evil eye.

However, if you’ve heard me utter even a single breath then you’re more than aware that I do not shut the hell up. Character flaw or character strength. Reader’s choice. Anyways, I’m trying to keep said “projects” more of a secret. Well, if you consider my ten best friends and then fifteen auxiliary people knowing as a secret, then yeah! I’m doing great at being covert.

Honestly, I don’t want to announce what I’m working on because of failure. I’m worried that I will fail, then I’ll have to tell everyone and watch the pity develop in their eyes. It’s a bit silly because one of my favorite mottos is “fail fast". In this scenario, though, there is no such thing as failing fast. I have to spend countless hours fearlessly pressing on knowing full well that I might not achieve what I want to. There is a painstaking amount of self-doubt and apprehension that hasn’t invaded my mind since I was in my late teens.

Even as I write this, I’m finding it difficult to bite my tongue. No, it’s not because I’m incapable of keeping a secret. Rather, I started this blog to eliminate my fear of being judged, yet I’m still holding back. I'm unsure how to navigate a situation like this. Should I be holding back so others don’t cast their judgments and negativity onto my goals? Or, should I unabashedly scream what I’m working toward from the rooftops?

Sincerely,

Shresta